How Can Transforming Relationships Lead to Personal Growth and Fulfillment?

Can you see the people in the picture above? Notice the smiles, the laughter. More than likely, they are not people that are newly clean or sober. Most in that situation do not feel they have much to smile about, initially.

People with addiction issues often have relationship issues, too. They grow up absorbing how to be and act in the world from their surrounding environment. (If you want to learn more about this, check out Dr. Gabor Mate's book, "In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts". It's fascinating!) Then at some point they begin using alcohol and/or drugs to blot out painful memories and trauma, which only serves to pile on more trauma. By the time they get clean/sober they've only known how to function dysfunctionally. They don't even know who THEY are, much less how to interact with other humans. If they stick with the clean/sober life, though, incredible transformation often can, and does, occur.

A common theme with addicts is that they tend to isolate and typically haven't felt like they've fit in anywhere, sometimes even their own families. It's hard to have fulfilling relationships with people when that is the case.

But there is hope! If people are able to self-reflect enough to see that they need addiction recovery in their lives, chances are they'll be assessing the rest of their lives, too. They begin to see their motivations in relationships with others and begin to course-correct old ways of being.

As a person moves through their recovery journey and old behaviors and patterns fall away, sometimes old relationships will, too. The more addicts are able to transform their relationships with themselves and their Higher Powers, the more they will see the relationships around them flourish. They will feel a connection to other people they never knew they even wanted. They're able to show up for people and in situations that addiction got in the way of before. They will know a sense of community they never dreamed possible. They will lift others and be lifted BY others through the darkest of times. Ideally, their recovery will be an ever-evolving, unfolding journey that they will get to help and be helped on. That, to me, is how transforming relationships can lead to personal growth and fulfillment.

Please note: this is a much abbreviated version of the process! I don't mean to oversimplify things here. If you are interested in diving deeper, please message me and I'm happy to discuss the topic further.

We cannot grow inside of a vacuum. In the dark. Isolating all by ourselves. There is help. There is hope. Please seek it if you are in need of it!